So, after all that, it’s standing on top of the flat, knowing you’re at the top. We can say, “We’re at the toppp, we’re at the toppp”. And i’ve seen a video of someone throw a cat off here. “That cat is a soldier”.
The smell of a freshly painted room reminds me of moving house. The cold, emptiness that comes with it. But soon the posters are up and its time to go to school. When you get home the smells already gone. And my room was good. That bed, that poster, learning my a.b.c’s, and a desktop computer. An 18-karat gold ring in a pot by bed. But my mum’s boyfriend was psychotic. He flooded the whole flat and slashed the car tires. He used to wait for us on the stairs leading up to our flat. I remember how he appeared one time like something out of a horror film, out of the dark. He shredded all of my mum’s clothes and cut up all of our photos. He dragged her all the way through town and no one did anything. He’s still around, I see him from time to time cycling around on his bike. Izaiah said he’d kill him next time he see’s him.
‘Yeh, yeh, it’s amazing. I saw a shark, well I fink it was a shark, it was more like a big wale fing. Weathers so sunny but they don’t feel like Christmas cause its sunny. I got a big pool and we got loads of sweets and snacks like savoury and salty on the plane’
“Dont go in there he’s got a gun”, this was outside Greggs. “You what?” I went in there, next thing he knows a geeza jumps the counter with a gun. Gas guns. Co2. “I beg you buy it off me.” “No money mate, lost it, bookies.”
They’re shit they are, new trainers. I don’t go school. Got expelled. Pushed him, smacked his head off the table. I got everything really. Some smack head tried selling me weed. I told him to fuck off.
Whether it’s true or not is up to you, but you’re gunna win, you’ll be famous, but first make me a sandwich and cut off the crust. I almost walked into another life then, 10,000,000 is a lot, it’s a fortune.
You Playing Out?
Digital film
1:20 minutes
I must have gone into the shop. Pickled Onion Space Raiders and those pink and blue fizzy bottles. I came out and Sarah was supposed to be looking after my bike. someone had thrown grass on it and spat on my handlebars. I was nine years old.
My next-door neighbour used to boast to the other kids on the estate that her dad invited those little toothbrushes you get in service station bathrooms. She had big glasses and horrible teeth, and said that one day she’d be famous. She taught me how to make scrambled eggs in a microwave. Genius.
Her mom used to cook us fish fingers and chips and chain smoked in the house. She loved Will Young and played his CD’s on a small purple CD player with glittery stickers on it. She had a pet hamster after i got one and her room smelled bad. Her toilet was separate from the bathroom and had a big window at the top. once she went in and i got a chair and looked in. i couldn’t see much.
Summer days. You playing out? Hot thick air from the tumble drier by the front door. Bottles of squash in plastic cups. I’ll knock on for them. After dinner. Cold feet on wooden floor boards. Sliding around with socks. Door mats and downstairs toilets. Mowed lawns and flower pots. Easter eggs where the chocolate turns white. All us kids sat round the table. 6 of us. Step mum smoking a cigarette on the step. The garden’s got a patio and the dog track’s behind it. The fence is easy to climb. After dinner we go back outside but I’m lying in bed. It’s still light outside. But we’re told to sleep. I hate going to bed early.
Down The Fold. My mum’s friend, her boyfriend had cupboards of bootleg games. vcd games like the ones you get at the market. Playstation 2 games. They were all copies but worked if your Playstation was chipped. They used to do it at the market for a tenner. And people selling old Sky TV boxes. You can chip those as well. All the channels. The corner shop, ice pops, her daughter had an older brother. He knew people in the estate and you’d open the door and the tumble drier was right there. Ordinary people cant afford gas,electric. Bell Lane, Parsons Hill, Maypole
30 °C SUMMER DAY with Becky. She was white. Pale skin and freckles. Her glasses were too big. I knocked on for Daniel. Helly. “what do you want?” blue tack marks on the walls. Talking about booking holidays. “Because we know it, we love it, why would we go anywhere else?”
